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You ever have a friend who just sucks the energy out of the room no matter what the situation is? Maybe you don’t, because who the hell wants a friend like that anyway?
Unfortunately, in video games, we often don’t get to choose our companions and some of them are just the worst to be around.
This can happen in any genre, and whether the character has a ton of dialogue or not, just their presence alone can make you unhappy that they’re even in your presence.
Harsh? Yes, but we’re gamers and there is no harsher critic in the world, so we wear our badges proudly. Here are a handful of characters that suck the life out of every situation.
10 Lost Soul Aside
Kaser… Are You Awake?
Lost Soul Aside drops the ball in a handful of ways, but one of the most egregious is the main character. Kaser is TEMU presents Noctis from Final Fantasy 15 and I swear, every line of dialogue this guy speaks is delivered with the passion of a monotone middle school motivational speaker.
No matter what the situation is, Kaser sounds like he just woke up from a nap. The world is ending with crazy aliens spawning all over the place? No problem. His sister kidnapped? Barely an emote. It’s almost impressive his lack of energy at times and I wondered if a big twist was coming where he was born without the ability to show an emotion, but alas, that’s nowhere to be found.
He sounds into it in combat, but when the characters engage in one of their long dialogue chains, everyone in the game seems into what’s going on, except the one that is in charge of literally saving the world.
9 Final Fantasy 12
Vaan, Why Are You Here?
I don’t think it’s controversial to call Vaan one of the worst characters in Final Fantasy history. As the de facto main character of Final Fantasy 12, Vaan contributes nothing to the overall story, and, on a scene-by-scene basis, he exists purely to piss everyone off, both you and the characters included.
He’s in so over his head in this adventure that it’s absurd, and both Baasch and Ashe serve as far better protagonists. Vaan is just aggressively stupid, has no tact, regardless of the situation, and you can just feel the other characters’ contempt for him whenever he decides to chime in, which unfortunately, is all too often.
Some may like him for the sort of «self-insert» protagonist part that he plays, but I couldn’t wait to change characters the second he popped up on my screen. Team Baasch for life.
8 Mass Effect: Andromeda
Ryder Makes Everything Worse
Mass Effect: Andromeda is a game that gives you a mixed experience, to say the least, but one thing that consistently brings it down is the main character. Whether you play as a male or female Ryder, the result is the same. This is one of the most boring main characters in existence.
Maybe it’s the consistent one-note tone they have, which I can only describe as aloof, or the fact that not a single situation manages to elicit anything interesting out of them, Ryder is a plain ham sandwich from start to finish.
Your party members are a mixed bag, too, but you’d think Ryder, being a human and talking to various alien species, would make a character have some type of reaction, but nope, Ryder is a terrible Nathan Drake clone through and through.
While your party at least fakes enjoyment with Ryder from time to time, this person is supposed to be one of the leaders of an entire race of people. They act like a complete joke half the time, and there is zero chance they’ve got the respect of these party members, making the whole tone of the game just feel off.
7 Ghost Recon: Breakpoint
Nomad, No Good
Ghost Recon: Breakpoint is a very story-focused game compared to previous entries in the game, but a lot of the reason it falls flat is due to the boring-as-hell main character, Nomad. I played the male version, and this guy was spawned from a 80s action movie and feels nothing like what the character should in everything from tone to attitude.
He’s as monotone as it gets, and despite having multiple situations where he’s needing to rescue people, he gives these poor characters as much warmth and reassurance as a zombie. It’s baffling how little Nomad has to offer as far as personality, especially when he’s surrounded by tech geniuses and all other kinds of eclectic personalities.
Hell, I’d have paid DLC to hear him say «Get bent nerd» to one of them, that’s how desperate I was to see this character make one ounce of effort to care about anything.
6 Vampyr
The Doctor Is In, and God is He Boring
Vampyr is such a cool game, from its aesthetic to its tone and gameplay loop. One thing that lets it down is the main character, Jonathan Reid. I don’t know what the direction was for this voice acting, but it’s somehow abrasive and boring all at the same time. He takes 50 lines to say one thing, and I’m less impressed with the good doctor’s vocabulary and more interested in when the hell he’s going to say something of substance.
Jonathan is constantly giving the characters in Vampyr the inquisition, but it’s not done in a way that’s compelling or even engaging. It’s more like someone talking to someone else.
There is zero sense of chemistry, and that whole, sultry, seductive vampire cliché is nowhere to be found here, and it’s honestly baffling that anyone would follow him anywhere, as he bores me to tears whenever he speaks. Maybe they’re allowing him to feed just so he will stop talking. I know I would.
5 Splinter Cell: Blacklist
Not My Sam Fisher
Before you get up in arms, if you haven’t played Splinter Cell: Blacklist, the iconic Michael Ironside was not the voice of Sam Fisher. We got a replacement who was younger and, unfortunately, completely dead inside when it comes to creating a character worth caring about.
Despite being a sequel, Sam is miraculously younger, and all the signature wit, sense of humor, and overall sense of experience isn’t anywhere to be found. Sam is as dull as dirt this time around, 100 percent serious and lacking chemistry with characters he supposedly has had years of experiences with.
It’s such a letdown because the interplay between Sam and his commanding officers during the mission was such a huge part of what made Splinter Cell stories great to play through. Here? Sam is just empty. There is nothing interesting about him, and it really feels like a different character from start to finish. The only way I enjoy this game is by thinking of Sam Finisher like 007, a moniker that can be passed on, because this version of him just sucks the life out of any scene.
4 Assassin's Creed 3
Wish We Played As Haytham
Assassin’s Creed 3 is one of the more underrated titles in the series, and the way it opens is among the best in the series. The opening mission as Haytham is incredible, and Haytham is an awesome character to play as. The second we see him inducted into the Templars, that’s that moment you’re hooked.
But then, the rug is pulled out from under you, and you begin playing as his son, Connor. That sequence is among the worst in gaming history, and when Connor finally grows up, you’re hoping for an interesting character to make up for the pain that sequence caused. And you don’t get it. Nothing in fact.
Connor is incredibly boring, and every conversation he’s in, whether it’s with the awesome mentor Achilles or several historical figures, Connor is an empty paper bag. He has one emotion: vaguely upset. That’s what you get from him, regardless of the topic, regardless of the situation, and it’s absolutely draining.
He was one of the worst protagonists the series has had when the game came out, and seeing some of the seriously great ones we’ve had since, he retains that title if only because not a single thing he has to say brings anything to a conversation.
3 Fallout 4
Preston Garvey, Go Away
Fallout 4 is a lonely world, and immediately, the game throws you a friend in the form of Preston Garvey. Well, that’s a friend nobody wanted and nobody asked for, and yet, the story mandates you two unite in the first quest of the game.
From that point on, Preston Garvey will become the neediest human of all time. You will get constant requests from him to go and do the various Minutemen quests, and they are all incredibly boring and largely pointless. He’s wildly uninteresting to talk to and nothing resembling a personality. Compared to some of the other characters in the game, like Nick Valentine, for example, Preston is simply a bother, and he never regrets his neediness or how annoying he is in the slightest.
Every time you find yourself talking to him, it’s just a dread, it feels like you’re late on homework with how he treats you, like it’s your fault all of this is happening almost. The worst character by far in Fallout 4, Preston is a personality vacuum unlike any other.
2 Death Stranding
Sam's Got Some Trouble Expressing Himself
Death Stranding is a strange game for sure, so it would make sense that our protagonist would be pretty strange too, right? Wrong, Sam is not only not strange, he’s not, well, anything. He barely speaks, and when he does, he feels so detached and empty compared to all the surrounding characters.
Whether he’s talking to the enigmatic Deadman, or getting a briefing from Die Hardman, Sam gives absolutely nothing in return. There is a hilarious scene late in the game where a character is literally in tears on their knees pouring their soul out to Sam, and he just stands there, saying nothing.
It’s a type of awkwardness that feels so unnatural, and no matter what scene Sam is in, he manages to suck the air out of the room. It’s like he barely registers what people are saying to him sometimes. Some players love how off-putting Sam can be as he feels «real» in that way, but to me, he just feels off, and it takes away from whatever exchange he’s a part of. Hell, even in his showdowns with Higgs, he barely emotes, despite coming face-to-face with a teleporting super terrorist.
1 God of War: Ragnarök
Boy… Shut Up
The God of War sequels have brought a lot of changes to the series, and the worst thing, is Atreus. Mostly known as Boy, God of War: Ragnarök puts him in a more prominent role, so far as that you play as him a ton as well. The problem is, Atreus sounds like a 2000s emo kid in a world of gods and monsters. It just doesn’t work. The tone of the game is thrown off whenever he’s the center of attention.
Ironwood, for example, is one of the worst gaming sections I’ve experienced, and that’s largely due to Atreus being front and center, offering nothing interesting, yet talking a ton and seemingly forgetting to have an emotion despite being attacked by giant grandmas and discovering the world of the giants.
He’s just so dull, and I don’t blame Kratos for his constant frustration with him either, as he acts as dumb as possible at all times, allowing himself to be manipulated by a handful of characters who have no qualms about it because there is no presence to him. Atreus is simply just there. The story would’ve benefited as much had Kratos become platonically attached to a sentient potato.
